careless sunday smile

most of my friends must've already tired hearing me babbling about the greatness of Beirut, Zachary Condon especially. Yes, couple years ago I was heavily infatuated with him. Not the heaviest, but definitely the longest infatuation period I ever had..

it was years ago, so why bring this up again?
I blame it to Vincent Moon. Couple hours ago he tweeted a link (the picture is taken from the aforementioned link), apparently someone has posted a FULL COMPLETE Cheap Magic Inside video on YouTube. Cheap Magic Inside was a project by Vincent Moon and Chryde, filming the band Beirut, basically playing all the tracks from the album Flying Club Cup while wandered around the Brooklyn area.
it is raw, beautiful, amazing, captivating.

the feelings I have to Zach Condon is a paradox, actually. a Love-Hate thing.
Yes, I'm amazed by his music, his voice takes my breath away, his lyrics brings the deepest melancholy feeling I have, and so on. But more than that, I envy him. ENVY. ANNOYED. It's his history, his luck, his courage.
He dropped out of high school at age 17, maybe basically no longer got interested. Although he attended community college, but only for a short period before he decided to took off to Europe, travelling with his elder brother. I hate the fact that at an age so young he got enough balls to take a risk so huge like that. Not to mention, he's just 10 months older than me.

it's that reality that it could've been me, but it's not.
the fact that at that same age, once, I did have the same curiosity, but didn't have enough courage.

..oh well.
it's useless to whine about it, of course.
Each men have his/her own path.

I'll just enjoy this (love-hate feelings).

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